By Alejandro Marrero 2014
Drop by Inconvenient Drop
by Alejandro N. Marrero 2014
Drop by drop and slowly it all fills up.
I’ve been keeping it all in my head lately.
It’s only when it’s past full that my thoughts spill and you get a taste of this salt.
Regardless it’s just a metaphorical elaboration of something that no one ever understands but the person who feels it.
I’d speak clearly but I’m out of Windex today.
Wishes and wants they’re everywhere.
It’s like we’ve become machines of consumption.
Spend a little here.
Give a little there.
When does it stop?
Truth is it doesn’t and I don’t have much.
I’ll always want more than I get.
Just wanted to spend time with you.
My genuine offer and constant investment with no return.
Still who loves to learn a lesson the easy way.
I’m getting better at pretending I’m not bothered.
I’m exhaling loudly.
The ever present sigh that people love to read between the lines.
Sure you know what’s going on.
Even if you guessed right I’d admit to nothing.
I don’t feel like being punished for feeling today.
I’ll keep my mouth shut thanks.
The truth’s always somewhere towards that silent left anyways.
I get a headache once in a while.
Alright lets not sugar coat it.
It’s a full fledged Migraine.
I see the spots and I know its coming.
Take some pills and pray it doesn’t last long.
Makes it hard to focus.
Yet even with my eyes closed I see you clearly.
No pill to make this particular ache go away.
It’s not random.
Its the truth of loving a challenge and hating it every step of the way.
Drop by drop and slowly it all fills up again.
No use in keeping it in my head anymore.
The evidence of the overflow is no longer easy to hide.
Might be a good thing since it probably doesn’t taste good anymore.
Plus they say out is better than in.
Do it fast enough and it feels good.
I’m raising my glass.
It’s a solute in the opposite direction of my happiness.
I wish you well.
Cause I’m so damn amazing.
Since I’m made of such strong glass, I’ll wish you both the best.
Even if it breaks me everyday.
Dreams are just lies we have the pleasure of waking up from.
I turned off the lights.
You like it this way.
I’m the love you feel in the dark.
The only time I matter.
I wonder if I ever mattered.
Still its hard to see in here.
I’m pretty sure I bumped into something just now.
My clumsiness that always preferred the light.
Something between the day and the night.
Proof I exist outside of anything.
I’m not filled with regret or remorse anymore.
Instead consumed drop by drop by the emptiness of being full.
Full of everything but you.
I’m past the place of surrendered return.
The seeds are in my heart and I’ve held back so many tears I’m sure they’ll grow.
Grow into what I wonder.
This is the peak of it all.
A dream shattered and a terrible end.
Still I wish I was in the middle.
The middle always has the promise of both directions.
Go left, go right?
Doesn’t matter, they both bring me back to this place.
A place where I’m surely always going to be.
Drop by drop somehow it always seems to fill it up.
Thought after thought, maybe this will guide me home.
That unstoppable river of us.
The current in the wrong direction.
Make certain to remember, Dreams are just hopes we have the pleasure of waking up from in the end.