Message Delivered: by Alejandro N. Marrero 1/9/2014

Weeks after hitting send and it’s Midnight again.
Alone in bed when I hear the ding.
The phone glows and there’s the reply from weeks gone by.
Do I matter only when you’ve been drinking?
Certainly feels that way.

I fall for it every time.
The things you say.
The promises you break.
Words as empty as my made up bed.

Got some time now.
It’s not a vacation but it does feel like uncharted territory.
No amount of planning could map this quest.

Should of, could of, would of never said that original High back in February.
Those were always easier than goodbyes and cool Novembers.

Miss your face by the way.
Not that it matters since the only thing that you want is below that.
It’s been weeks and months.
I don’t want it to be this way but it is and nothing makes you stay.

Guess surrender was never my style.
Time out and solitude was threatening me with a good time.
Introverted bliss.
Maybe I’ll forgive it all for that one simple kiss.
Yet we both know that’s just going to be your fist.
I’ve been beaten into stone.

I wear my heart on the inside now so thank you.
Guess it’s better than having it on my sleeve.
Feels more consuming now.
Even when people and decisions make it skip beats.

Wandering around an empty but beautiful home.
Memories here and there in such neat and clean ways.
Yet it’s a house not a home.
No matter how hard I try to make it feel like one.

I fall for it every time.
The things you say.
The promises you break.
Words as empty as my made up bed.

I hit reply by the way.
That midnight text weeks too late.
Even agreed to a promise I know you’ll break.
Guess learnings never’s as easy as making mistakes.

It’s the next day now.
No ding or alert to greet my day.
Just a half empty box of cereal and no milk.
It’s what I’ve always expected.
Regardless it’s quieter this way.
I just have to wait till you’ve been drinking again.

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