Artist Unknown

Wind-song Lose-song by Alejandro N. Marrero 8/4/2020

They say to win some, you’ve got to lose some. Well, I’ve lost quite a lot
I’ve been defeated so often I wonder each time Why do I even try to get back up when the winning never starts
Brow pinched in concern and lines of worry are on my face
Even wounded and broken I’ve never stopped thinking maybe next time I’d eventually win the race
Then you got my good intentions, turned them into weapons and shot me in the back
There’s nothing like the ones that I care for that leaves me vulnerable to their attacks
You win some, you lose some that’s what they always say
Well I’ve done a lot of writing, earned very little and still hoping for that barely reachable pay
People love to talk it’s like their afraid of the blessed sacred silence
All they do is complain, disparage, break the peace or worse cause violence
I’m no soldier but I’ve been to battle once or twice each day
You’d think I’d see them coming by now but they come from inside me and every direction anyway
My mania has been on overdrive this week and it’s made we a productivity machine
Listing all the things I do with my time like I need proof to show you what I actually mean
I’m not an easy person each moment to the next you never know what you’re going to get
It may be the calm and gentle side or the wrathful, loud one you’ve barely even met
They say you have to lose some, to win some but it hasn’t happened yet.
I’ve been battling my body, mind and speech for decades now so maybe I simply lost the bet
With two sides to every coin I wonder why we flip them at all
Making decisions at random when there’s few I’d actually call.
I feel trapped by all the media with its likes, hearts and stars
Wondering if my words could ever mend a fence or even all our many scars
I’ve been a special kind of neurotic the last few short nights and even quicker days
I’m just tired of having to get back up or proving myself either flipping way
I took a deep breath just now because I often forget to breathe
Something so monumentally simple it’s on autopilot but I need reminders because I’m me.
They say a lot of things wether we want to hear them or not
In the end it doesn’t matter if you hear or read them unless you’re the one getting shot

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