Out of Chances by Alejandro N. Marrero 8/18/2020

I don’t think it’s going to work anymore
Somewhere along, the lines got crossed and it’s not like you trust me like before
Never ever has your psychosis been true or remotely right
It’s always come out of left field and been more about your own past wounds or frights
So you offered a temporary arrangement and it clearly wasn’t enough
You said it yourself you have enough to deal with without storing anyone else’s stuff
When did people lose their worth in value that you tolerate or treat them this way?
What makes a kid better or worse than yours anyways?
There’s some effed up line people love to draw on the sand
They act like they pay your bills, try and control you or tell you how to be on your own damn lands
I’m not a child but surrounded by people who act the embodied part
I’m tired of the awkwardness the misunderstandings and gods you’re always so fucked up
There’s no halo on my head I’m human, flawed, real and absolutely true
There’s just no space for me to hate, control or tell others like you what to freaking do
I’m going through the motions and been trying my hardest not to be pressured by you to bend
Yet how you make me feel lately makes me wonder if you’re truly worth it in the end
There’s a paranoia in all of our minds
It’s potent powerful and sometimes yes, has us leave our friends behind
I’m worthy of respect though, I’ve earned it after all my challenges in life
I’m an adult you forget that and had to grow up older quicker if we had to compare like always this very night
Still it’s true it’s all about complete submission and complete or undeserved utter control
You don’t respect me or those around you unless they follow your self appointed roles
There’s confusion in most of our struggling transient and hardship filled lives
Yet kindness is a clarity it doesn’t stab, maim or kill like your unveiling of worded pointy knives
I’m a three strikes guy because I ever mind the rule of three
Whatever you send out does come back much larger when it returns indeed
However karma chooses to teach you how to truly live
Stop trying to control what you yourself can’t offer or even have the grace enough to give
Some of us are simply kind people, no agenda or hidden motives
The way you’ve acted however is the opposite and yes it’s been completely noticed
Somewhere across the span of time I’ve known you and been so loyal and kind
You got comfortable enough to scold me for doing right by everyone each and every time
So enough is enough I’m tired of each and every time I make effort or dare to try
You’re always so fucked up you can’t remember the truth and believe your conjured conspiratorial lies
Do us all a favor and go on that trip far far away
I think it would do us all a great favor to be distanced or have you no longer control what stays
All I know is everyday I try to be the best version of myself
Yet anytime I extend the olive branch of kindness you think only of yourself
I don’t think it’s going to work anymore it’s got to be this way
Somewhere along, the lines got crossed and it’s not like you trust me or others genuinely anyway
Never ever has your recent psychosis been true or even remotely right
It always comes out of left field and been more about your own wounds or frights
Today was the straw that broke the camel’s back of course my compassion gave you to strike four
Something I never do with anyone not like this or ever before
Travel away or leave and go on your self fulfilling planned bossy adventures
I’m tired of your antics, anger and your paranoid relentless natures
I’ve given my all and wish you well forever in the days ahead
However, I’m done allowing you to control me or place your damages in my head
Instead C’est la vie to you the unapologetic soon to be former exhausting friend

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